Feelings...

Sometimes I wish I could disappear... Sometimes I wish I wasn’t here…I wonder what world would be without me.. What if I could change everything…  Everything makes me weaker… I wonder if people have any feelings, or they’re heartless or they act like they’re happy but inside they’re just sad, desperate… I don’t know people… They’re just lying all the time… I do agree that everybody lies, everybody, even me… do you want to know why? Because sometimes it’s necessary to see the truth beyond the lies... But what about if it hurts? Have you ever thought about it? Maybe yes or maybe not.. Who knows.. But it’s better face the truth in every case.. I’m so confused.. I don’t know the truth…  Was it real? Time goes so fast.. I can’t even realize what’s happening around me… In the end everybody leaves.. Or it’s me.. I leave everybody… Or either me or everybody… I’m so small in this big world… And despite this  I love this world… I wish I could fly or I was a bird… I would fly all day long,  I would be free… Just free…  Why we hurt those who love us...why we can’t live without problems... You would say that it’s impossible... I would say that everything is possible... But do I believe this? I want to believe... But everything is different... Sometimes I look at people and see that they’ve changed... They’re not the same.. They’re just strangers... And wonder why? What happened? I can’t find the answers, but I need them very much to live... To be happy... To make people feel happy... But questions are all the time in my head... where are the answers... I wish I knew the place to find them... Everything’s so complicated... Is it worth to live? Life goes on for everybody, but I’m stuck in this time... I just can’t move... Maybe you think that I’m depressed, no I’m not, I just don’t know what to do... I don’t want to lose what I love... I don’t want to grow up, I don’t want to be a stranger for myself... I don’t want to lie... I don’t want to act... But I have to... And that’s so unfair... Just want to tell people that I love them, but I’m afraid that they will leave me... Everyone breaks your heart and doesn’t think about you... Then you cry...drowning in your tears... But they just don’t care, do they? Someone said that eyes are the mirror of the soul... But does anyone have soul? Or they’re just empty inside... I don’t know answers and nobody can give me them... I’ll try to move forward without answers hoping that I’ll find them on my way of the life...